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« Fifty Shades of Grey: Myths about Abuse | Main | September Update »

September 01, 2012



Thank you for reading this - so I don't have to - and for giving such a clear framework for a response. The review confirms what I feared - that the book normalises abuse. How are today's women going to find the self-confidence to have fulfilling, life-giving, life-enhancing relationships if this is what they are being fed? So sad.

Fran Bowen

Thanks you for your clear and succinct review of FSOG. I almost innocently purchased the trilogy to download onto my Kindle! Something held me back Praise God! Having read a similar review since I feel relieved not to have been sucked in.

I agree and feel that women read it, and say they liked it for fear of being a prude. It seems God is bringing me into contact with women and men who are interested in reading it and I am able to warn them not to.

I also feel that young men (and women) could read this and see it as the norm of sexual behaviour and treatment of women because of the sensationalism and hype surround the book.

Thank you again,

Fran Bowen

Christopher Heward

I haven't read the book but i find it crazy that it has become socially unacceptable to have 'submit' in wedding vows, and yet this is a best-seller. So to have someone who wants to love and protect you and do the best for you and help you to flourish, is seen as degrading to women, but to be openly abused and exploited by a man for his own ends is somehow seen as empowering, if done with consent.

It demonstrates the bizarre situation where exploitation is acceptable if it is consensual, which is difficult because how do you define consensual? Is sweatshop labour consensual if they choose to work (rather than to starve), regardless of how exploitative the wages are?

It also shows that we think we seek after choice, and what we think that means is freedom, but what it means in practice is options! So this book essentially provides another option for a lady to be exploited through, in a sense...!

And so because she chooses to commit to it (and because it is against current cultural norms) all is well, and yet a woman who chooses to 'submit' to her husband is seen as weak and dis-empowered because she is seen as incapable of rejecting a past cultural norm that other women aren't enamoured with.

All seems a bit crazy to me.


Thank you for a very valuable, and thoughtful review. I have read all 3 books in the trilogy - driven by curiosity professionally. As a therapist my clients were beginning to make reference to it so I thought it was worth being well informed. There are very disturbing images and concepts, which as you rightly point out need to be carefully thought through. I was wondering how the concept of healing or 'freedom' would be handled right into the final book, and I was hugely disappointed and disturbed. Frankly the books became boring in the extreme, poorly written, but with the ability to plant images in the mind. I have also been disturbed by the way in which the apparent 'excitement' of the fictional romantic 'hero' has fed deep dissatisfaction in real relationships. The real power of the book is perhaps not in its sexual explicitness but the insidious way in which abusive behaviours are not only condoned but seen as attractive and desirable. Having completed book 3 I was clear that I did not want to put even one copy back into circulation and shredded and burnt it. Tragically the ideas in these books will provide me with work for years to come. Not something I relish - despite my much loved occupation.

Stella Smith

the movie fifty shades of grey
I m excited for the 50 Shades Of Grey Movie. I cant wait for releasing date

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